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Bills Dominate Jets!
Free Coffee for Everyone!
by Tony Bogyo
September 26, 2006

Color me excited about the Bills performance on Sunday. No, wait – I’m more than excited – I am completely OUT OF CONTROL with excitement. The adrenaline is still flowing through my veins and I haven’t felt the need to sleep since Sunday night – damn, I’m PUMPED!!! At the home opener, the stadium was sold out, the tailgating was great and the Bills ABSOLUTELY DOMINATED THE JETS!

In my annual Hajj to Ralph Wilson Stadium (if you’re an able-bodied Bills fan of means you must make this trip at least one in your lifetime) I had a great time before the game started. NFL films was there filming Pinto Ron and his crew providing bowling ball shots and cooking up all sorts of cuisine on the hood of his pinto, making pizza in an old filing cabinet and frying up wings in an old WWII army helmet – it was really fun to see and I was absolutely JACKED for the game to start! Come on 1pm – you can get here soon and end my waiting!

It starts to rain as I head in to the stadium, I know God is weeping with joy for this moment and I am PUMPED! The wind is blowing hard and Brain Moorman is booting 70+ yard punts in warm-ups – 70+ yards!!!

As the start of the game drew near and I was chomping at the bit. I was so excited that it didn’t even bother me that the fireworks set to go off during the anthem (at “the rockets red glare”) fizzled and produced only a pathetic puff of smoke. There was a military helicopter flyover which was a bit late, but WAY COOL! Some say this “too little, too late” pregame was a metaphor for the Bills performance later in the afternoon, but those folks are crazy – the Bills ROCKED!

Don’t believe me? Let the stats do the talking my friend. The Bills racked up 475 total yards on offense, almost twice what the Jets put up. Willis McGahee AND J.P. Losman had career bests – the running back with 150 yards on the ground and the young quarterback with 328 yards through the air. Who says the Bills have an anemic offense? Damn!!

The Bills had 26 first downs, a full 9 more than their opponents. They averaged 7.3 yards per pass play and 5.5 yards per rushing play. The longest Jet run of the day was for 8 yards. The Jets were penalized more times and for more yardage than the Bills – a sign of solid coaching. Woo Hoo, Dick Jauron – YOU DA MAN!!!

OK, there were some bad parts as well – but that’s just kind of a blur to me. The Bills were 3 for 12 on third down conversions and only 1 for 4 on fourth down conversions. They failed to stop New York on their only 4th down conversion (who knew Chad Pennington was such a gazelle?). They gave up a 47 yard play off a dump pass when the kitchen sink blitz failed. Oh yeah, there were also those 3 turnovers and a failed trick play. But for these minor indiscretions our boys would have won the game.

The Bills fought hard all afternoon – gotta love the effort!!! The never say die spirit had them pull within 8 points (that’s a single score game, folks) in the fourth quarter not once but TWICE! That’s dedication and drive! The best play of the game was when Losman rushed into the endzone for the Bills second touchdown of the afternoon – Bills 20, Jets 28. That was huge. With that run everyone in the stadium, EVERYONE, got free coffee from Tim Horton’s (those guys are fools – they will give away free coffee whenever the Bills score 2 or more touchdowns – man, they’re going to take a bath on that deal).

The Bills then executed a perfect onside kick and were driving for the tying touchdown when the rain started falling. The game ended when Losman underthew a pass to Josh Reed on 4th and 3. The Bills had lost. I was bummed.

When I woke up on Monday morning I decided to head over to Tim Horton’s to get my free cup of coffee. Actually, I had coupons for lots of coffee – people dropped their programs on their way out of the stadium and I scooped them up, knowing black gold lay inside. As I had a very long drive back to Boston, I figured I should have a couple of cups of Joe before I hit the road. So I drowned my sorrows in 4, 5, 8, 14 cups of free coffee (did I mention the folks at Tim Horton’s were fools?). Let me tell you – that’s just what the doctor ordered. Before long I was riding high on the Bills and making good time on the NYS Thruway (actually, I made great time – it usually takes me about 6 ½ hours to make the trip – I made it back in 4 hours!!!). Upon reflection I realized the Bills actually WON that game. Sure, it doesn’t show in the score, but you know it, I know it and the Jets know it – isn’t that really what it’s all about, anyway? The Bills ROCK!

I’m feeling a bit lightheaded, but I’ve still got that post game adrenaline and I’m looking for things to do. I think I’ll skip sleep tonight and go alphabetize my CD collection, and when I finish that I’ll put new laces in all my shoes. I wonder if I could clean out my gutters tonight if I had a good flashlight…


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